Decluttering Doesn't Have to be Scary

How to handle multiples, the "maybe" method, and questions I ask clients to declutter intentionally

Spring has arrived in Milan! I’ve been gifted with the most glorious blue skies and sun for my last week here, which I’m very grateful for. Milan is typically a grey and rainy city. I’ve loved my time here, but I’m moving further South. I’ll have a Milan guide for you in the next free newsletter, but for now? I’m packing up some of my winter items for the season and it got me thinking about how hard it is to let go of our clothes - even the ones we know we’ll see again!

It’s hard to let go of anything, really - relationships, clothes, habits … but at a certain point when it’s time to let go, we do it. In my experience, the push I need to release what no longer serves doesn’t come from a calculated decision or in-depth analysis. It comes when I least expect it.

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO DECLUTTER?

This goes for clothes, too. Why do so many of us put off decluttering? Why is it so hard to get rid of that hoodie from our ex? The too-tight jeans that fit in another life? The blazer worn once for that interview 5 years ago? The dress that we settled for because it fits but doesn’t feel great?

All of this is so normal and human. There’s a lot of fear and emotion wrapped up in letting go of our clothes. We like comfort, we like predictability, we don’t like change, and we don’t want to make a “fashion mistake” by not having the right thing to wear at the right time.

But as you likely already know, it’s really hard to bring in anything new, or develop our style if our closets are so full of stuff in the first place.

HOW TO DECLUTTER INTUITIVELY

So how do we declutter in a way that feels good, and how do we do it in a way that doesn’t contribute to the mountains of fashion waste that is suffocating our oceans, desserts, and disrupting economies in the global south?

Ouf that last bit was tough, but if you’re here, you likely know that compulsive and mindless decluttering can be just as harmful as a fast fashion haul.

This is where our intuition comes in. We can write all the list of pros and cons and follow every decluttering decision chart on the internet, but ultimately, we already know whether we want to keep something or let it go. But it’s hard to hear what our gut is telling us when fear and emotion are in the driver's seat. As with shopping, making good decisions is a combination of how we want to feel and how we want to look.

Here are 5 habits that will quiet the noise and give you the opportunity to check in with yourself for better decluttering decisions.

1 - don’t rush it - shop your closet for a month before editing

Before grabbing your garbage bags or terracycle box, give yourself a runway to make well-informed decluttering decisions. Spend a month shopping your closet and getting to know your inventory. Clues to what you do and don’t like are already hanging in your closet. Take a photo of your outfit each day (even the not so great ones!) and review them at the end of the month.

Which ones did you feel great in and why? Why not?

What textures/colours/prints did you gravitate to most?

What silhouettes do you love?

What elements of style do you like to repeat?

If you are an overachiever, download Indyx and become part of their membership so you can collect all kinds of data about what you’re wearing. (Not sponsored, it’s a great tool if you like quantitative stuff!)

2 - always be editing - consistency > intensity

You’ll know how you like to declutter best; seasonally, consistently, or as needed. I prefer to be constantly editing so I don’t get overwhelmed by a huge task. Consistent editing is easier the more time you spend in your closet. That’s why step 1 is super helpful!

A good example of when you know it’s time to declutter something is when you have passed over a garment several times in one week or in a month. If you’re repeatedly putting it back - figure out why. If it’s not a styling, mending, or washing issue, you can put it in your maybe pile. Which leads me to …

3 - don’t declutter right away - use the “maybe” method

The “maybe” method is my favourite way to declutter. I keep a basket or bag near my closet for anything I think should be decluttered. I leave it in the bag or basket for several months, and if by the end of the season or year I haven’t missed it, I know it’s ready to be let go. This process allows us to bypass scary “what if” scenarios because we’ve spent a whole year without the garment. This should have built our confidence and ability to style without it.

*I don’t apply this method to eveningwear. In fact, I rarely declutter evening wear. Even though I rarely wear it, eveningwear is the type of thing that is good to have on hand if it still fits and you still love it. The reason is because we tend to put a lot of pressure on how we want to *look* for big events, but if we re-center ourselves and how we want to *feel* we’ll likely already have something in our closet that works. With some re-styling footwear and accessories, we avoid buying (and having to declutter!) something that we bought with a specific event in mind that doesn’t feel authentic.

5 - how to deal with multiples - Multiples are tricky! If sizing is a challenge, I understand having multiples can provide ease and peace of mind. Here are some questions I ask clients to determine whether they should keep or let go of their multiples:

• Do they each serve a different purpose?

• Are there style elements that differentiate them? (different silhouette, fit?)

• If you were to add another one to your closet, would you be able to let any of them go?

We often think of multiples as being the same item in different colours, but things like shape, texture, and neckline can be different iterations of the same garment too. If you are not finding any variety in your multiples, and want to let some go, ask yourself this:

• Which style element appeals to me most? Colour? Shape? Texture? Consider letting go of the multiples with the style elements that appeal to you least. For example, if you love playing with colour, keep the garments that give you more colour variation.

5 - how to deal with weight fluctuations - As women, our weight fluctuates so much. Often in the same month! If you’re at a transition period in your life, consider storing your favourite garments until your body stabilizes. If you know your weight fluctuates between a few sizes, store a few favourite items - a very selective capsule so to speak!

6 - a tiny mindset shift - As you’re editing, ask yourself what do you want to keep in your closet, vs. what do you have to let go. It puts you in a place of empowerment and abundance, instead of feeling like a forced parting. YOU get to decide what stays in your life, and your closet. And that’s a pretty powerful thing!

NEWS!

Phew! I hope you liked this newsletter! If you want to dig into decluttering and mindset shifts more; we’re getting INTO IT in the community. If you love Shop Your Closet content, my next live virtual Shop Your Closet event is on April 5th! I would love to see you there. I did a video about what I’ve learned so far about the Italian art of effortless style - you can watch it HERE, and we even talked about Milanese style on the Podcast!

Thank you for being here and have a lovely month of March!

Alyssa

xx